My family is stupid, and we need to come up with a place to go for summer vacation. We are incapable of doing this, however, because as I just mentioned, we are STUPID. So I’m going to lay down the rules that have been given, and if anyone out there has any ideas, let me know.
Rule #1: Cannot be hot. Dad doesn’t want to take a summer vacation anyplace hot.
Rule #2: Cannot be crowded. Dad doesn’t want to go anywhere crowded.
Rule #3: Cannot be the beach. Helen doesn’t like the beach.
Rule #4: Cannot be in the mountains. I do not like mountains.
Rule #5: Cannot be a ranch. I do not like ranches.
So there you go. Five simple rules. It can’t be that hard to find a place to go. Of course, if it were up to me, we’d just go to Disney World. Every year. Always.
9 Comments
Rule #6: Cannot be outside the US. For some unknown reason, family members
are too incompetentrefuse to ever get passports.That said, the Wisconsin Dells appear to violate none of the stated rules.
no beach, no mountains? Wow. Those are like my favorite places. You might as well stay in Missouri. Nothing says “family vacation” like Missouri, or Iowa, or Kansas….
http://www.explorenunavut.com/
I know a lovely place: it’s approx. 140 miles south of Amsterdam. LOL. (rules 1 – 5 apply). You can sleep in a tent in the garden of the American Embassy (rule 6 will apply).
Unlimited access to the secret Belgian beer stocks.
Do not, under any circumstance, go to the Wisconsin Dells.
I suggest Bar Harbor, Maine – it’s my next vacation destination… supposed to be beautiful, with Acadia National Park right there, it’s on the water (but not in a beachy kind of way), it has a super cute historic district, and AMAZING seafood restaurants. You can go whale watching, too.
Oh, and it’s also a balmy 70 degrees even in July.
Thanks for considering my interests in the summer vacation planning. I do like beaches though. It’s the ocean I do not like. Maine sounds neat. I’ve never been. But I guess I’ve never been to the WI Dells either.
Don’t go to the Wisconsin Dells! Trust me on this one. My family was very disappointed.
I was going to suggest Prince Edward Island or another equally beautiful place in Canada…but that violates rule #6.
My parents’ idea of a vacation is to rent a cabin in Door County, Wisconsin or Michigan. Door County is really nice; one of my favorite things we did there was rent scooters for an hour and ride around a national park!
You could also go on a cruise around Alaska.
I go to Door County twice every year and love it.
But I repeat – DO NOT GO TO THE DELLS.
How about Vegas? It’s hot, crowded, desert is practically beach, and I’m sure there are some fake mountains and ranches around. It would be a true Halley family vacation if everyone were miserable. =)