Smackie the Frog

I think the thing I hate most about having a house is mowing the lawn. The problem is that no matter how many times you do it, you just have to keep doing it more and more. It is like this never ending cycle of stupidness. Especially because I don’t gain any joy from my lawn, so it is just this stupid, tedious task that I have to do.

Well anyway, since I’m such a “not fan” of lawn mowing, I don’t really do it that often. Which leads to another problem. That when I do get around to doing it, it is about a million times worse than it probably would be if I’d do it in some sort of regular fashion.

Last night, for instance, I mowed my back yard. And there were weeds growing back there that were 4 feet tall, with a “trunk” an inch wide. That is a big ass weed. But the grass itself wasn’t even that tall. So I wasn’t really even mowing grass. Just mowing big stupid weeds.

Anyway, the point of this, is that I am taking applications if anyone would like to be my lawnmower. The pay is non-existent, and honestly, I’m not very nice, so you probably won’t get a lot of thanks. But you will have the satisfaction of a job well done! And really, you don’t even have to do that good a job, because I don’t care.

So just leave a comment or something saying that you’d like to be my lawn mower, and I’m sure that we can work something out.